Showing posts with label 32 weeks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 32 weeks. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

"Your baby looks wonderful"

Those are some pretty strong words for someone coming from the infertility depths in which I've been. But that's what she said after my first NST (nonstress test) this morning. "Your baby looks wonderful".

I feel like everyone is waiting for a complication. A blip in this otherwise seemingly great pregnancy. Other than aches and pains, which I would gladly suffer through for as long as it takes, this pregnancy really has been, well, normal. Other than the constant monitoring, but that's more because the risk is there.

But she...she is great. It's all up to my body to just hang in there a little longer. As of yesterday, I was 32 weeks. In 6 more days I'll be at the same point in which my boys were born. I certainly would rather she didn't come early...but if she did, my little guys are proof that all will be fine. I take comfort in that.

I'll be doing weekly NST's for the remainder of the pregnancy. This little gal is in the 81st percentile and measuring 3 weeks ahead. I can't believe I'm actually looking at having a BIG baby. How that's possible, I have no idea. My husband arrived in this world weighing around 9 pounds. So guess she's taking after him! My doctor seems to be against inducing early, regardless of her size. This should be interesting. Guess we'll find out at the MFM appointment when we find out about the placenta accreta in two weeks if it even matters.

My boys are amazing. Like I can't get enough of them. I miss them like crazy when I'm at work and think of them nonstop. The second I get home, I don't know who's happier, them or me. Probably me. I sometimes want to pinch myself because none of this seems like it should be real. How is it fair? There are women I still think of often and pray get their miracle. They deserve it so much. How is it possible that regardless of what I've gone through, here I am about to have my third child in less than 6 months? The realization and guilt does overwhelm me at times.

But I couldn't, wouldn't change a thing. Not the years of infertility. Not using an egg donor. Not using a surrogate. Even if I knew then, what I know now...it wouldn't matter. Those boys light up my world. They are my first born and will for the rest of my life, be the little loves of my life.

My sweet, sweet Britton & Casey
3.5 months