Tuesday, February 17, 2015

I get to SEE them.

Well I had written a post last night, then went to edit it on my phone, and accidentally deleted it. So...I'm starting from scratch.

What's most important is...I'm currently 10,000 feet in the air, headed to Texas. I'm leaving the 0 degree temperatures in Indianapolis, and going to enjoy a bit of the "cold front" that South Texas is dealing with. A balmy 55 degree high today. I may have packed my flip flops for this very occasion. But that's still not the gist of this post. I'm heading to South Texas to see Kelly and my babies. For the first time IN person.

Last Friday, Kelly went to get a 4d ultrasound. It was amazing. The amount of pictures and video that I was able to see was simply overwhelming. We officially have little legs. What a beautiful sight to see. There little heartbeats are so strong. What more could I ask for at this point?

As of 11w1d

On Saturday I received a call from CCRM. Kelly has officially graduated from their care. Her body has completely taken over and she is completely done with her pills, suppositories and injections. Much to her relief, no doubt about it.

Tomorrow morning we are going together to her first OB appointment. I'm excited to see the babies on that ultrasound screen in person. Not through video or pictures, but right there in front of me. I'm excited to meet the doctor, to ask questions, for them to see that I'm a real person, and going to be a mother.

I'm thrilled to see Kelly. To give her the biggest hug ever. It's the first time I'll have seen her since we left Denver after her transfer. I get to see her tiny little bump. Cause believe me, it's tiny. Even at almost 12 weeks with twins, she's itty bitty.

I still have little moments that I remember that I'm not getting to experience this pregnancy myself, and I won't pretend that it doesn't hurt sometimes. The little things like, what would my cravings be like? The looks when I say that we're having twins, and people automatically look for a bump. And I follow up with, "Well, we're using a surrogate". But not much and not for long. Because the joy I feel in my heart is way to big to allow that kind of sadness and hurt to stick around for long. I'm grateful for that.

I know that this is my time for happy. And I am. I really, really am.