First of all, my first RE appointment was everything I hoped it would be. Of course, we were running late due to road closures and one way streets and anything else that could pop up in the way, which just sent me into a frantic tizzy. T was driving like a maniac! We made it up there, and of course sat in the waiting room for about 15 minutes and then we sat in the consultation room for another 20ish minutes. Seriously, I was shaking so bad. I couldn't believe that T was sitting there reading/laughing at the jokes in the Readers Digest! I couldn't concentrate on anything! I had all my papers in front of me. Questions, charts, spreadsheet, all of it. Then, in walks Dr. J.
This guy was awesome. T loved him. He just walked in, shook our hands, sat down and said "go". Oh great, put it all on me. I mean I was hoping to be lead a little before throwing out all my crazy info to him!! So I started at the beginning. We told him about being together for 11 years, but only married for a little over 1. We told him about the ectopic we experienced while on the Mirena IUD a few months before our wedding. His response to that was "wow, that's pretty hard to do", my response was yes, yet here we sit. I told him about waiting 3 months after the metrotrexate injection and a month after our wedding to begin ttc. About how my cycles were 40ish days (having to use Provera) and then ultimately being given Letrozole in October of last year, only to find out the cycle before I started that, I was pregnant. I told him about the spotting during my pregnancy, and then of course about the ultrasounds that showed only a sac. I then told him about the botched d&c that didn't remove the pregnancy that sent us on a wild goose chase at the ER over Thanksgiving weekend only to have another d&c only 5 days after the first. I told him it took 9 1/2 weeks for my next cycle to begin.
We told him about T's SA. How his count wasn't low, but were slightly less than average, still doctors all said more than enough to get pregnant. We told him about the mental "issues" that have come with baby dancing on a schedule. How difficult that's been for us (especially him) and the anxiety that has caused him (and me). His response? SEX ON DEMAND!! It's so completely normal. He told T, we're done with you. You're FINE! My heart just about overflowed with joy for T. I can't even tell you how stressed he's been about the performance issue.
I then told him about my last 7 cycles. They seemed more normal. As far as they were less than 30 days, but they had short LP's. I finally took my Letrozole and it was only a 23 day cycle so when my OB suggested Clomid, I jumped at it. (wince) I told him that the second I was prescribed the Clomid, I call his office and made my appointment, only to be told it would be 3 1/2 months away. So I did the Clomid. I struggled through 2 cycles of unmonitored Clomid. He was shocked my side effects, emotionally and hot flashes, weren't worse than they were. I told him of my concern for my lining and how I pushed so hard to finally be monitored that 3rd and final cycle. BTW, why doesn't my OB know that I'm too skinny for Clomid? I mean how can simple things like that be missed between 2 types of doctors that are so closely related?! Food for thought...moving on. He asked how I knew to be concerned. I told him, that I've learned the hard way through people I love, being in my shoes before me. I told him about the u/s that showed that my lining was indeed only 5mm last month, but my ovulations on Clomid were so strong. I told him about the HCG trigger, but the lining just never got there. Finally I told him about this cycle. How I had decided no meds, but that it seemed like nothing was happening. He asked how I wanted to start. I told him well, I really want to know what's going on right now...his response, well, lets go get an ultrasound. And we did.
And guess what? I was right. Absolutely NOTHING was going on with my ovaries. So glad I spent a week and a half peeing on OPK's 3x a day! Even worse, my lining didn't thicken. It was even more thin than last month. 4.5mm. Wow.
Back to the consultation room we went. Dr. J told us to consider this cycle a vacation. He ordered blood work. Prolactin and thyroid screen, I went this morning for my blood draw for that. I was given a prescription for Letrozole (Femara) that I will take on my next cd 2-6. After that, I'll begin FSH injections with an u/s on cd 10. A HCG trigger shot will then be given and after T makes his contribution, we'll do an IUI.
NO MORE SEX ON DEMAND (from here one out, better known as SOD!). We couldn't decide if we felt guilty or giddy over not making a baby the old fashion way. I can tell you with 100% certainty, the giddy definitely won over the guilty.
So Dr. J called me Miss Well-Informed multiple times. It was pretty funny, and even though he glanced at the BBT charts, I was happy that he did take interest in my spreadsheet!! He then told me, no more monitors, no more temping and no more OPK's. I no longer need them. He will already know all of this for me. Wowsers. My second huge sigh of relief of the day. I don't even know what it will feel like not to have to POAS or cup the majority of my cycle. I wonder how long it will take for my body to stop automatically waking up between 6 and 6:30 am for a temp/monitor reading. Yay. Yay. Yay.
I asked how many of each treatment will we do before moving on. He said only 2 and we'll take a month off in between. Because of my ectopic and past endometriosis, he normally would have done a laporoscopy before anything else. The fact that we got pregnant since, he's going to push that off. If after 2 IUI's we are not pregnant, we will go straight to the laporoscopy before moving on to the next treatment. Unfortunately he did throw out the, "because your 35" it will be a 20% chance. Whatev. I'm a super young 35!!
Holly Moses, it's a plan AND it's a detailed, well thought out plan that is out of my hands. I feel relieved. T & I are thinking about celebrating by having just plain old sex this weekend. No baby dancing, no doing the deed. In my doctor's words "if you're horny, have sex"!
Now that's a brilliant idea.
Lastly, I want to thank all my FRIENDS that follow me from BBC & Ovagraph for sending me your thoughts, encouragement, laughter and strength through your comments and emails. I don't know how'd I'd get through any of this without you all. There is most definitely a time for us to have our day, and I will hope and pray that it happens very soon for us all. I will be cheering you all on, just as hard as you have cheered me on. Lastly, thank you to JB, my one and only follower that knows me in "real" life. What else can I say but where in the world would I be without you. NYC...here we come.