The past few days have been riddled with anxiety. It all came down to these past few days and how many blasts we would have to transfer, how many chances we'd have, would we be able to try for a sibling...
In our heads, we kept saying that four would be good. We would be content if that number frozen had been four. If it were less than four, yes, it would definitely be a better shot than we've yet to have, but what if it didn't work? The pressure would really be on. I would have stressed over it. I have no doubt. But realistically, about half make it to freeze-quality blast. Four is realistic.
Six was what we wanted. What we hoped and prayed for. Six would give us multiple chances. It gives us options. But six, is 67% of nine. That seemed unlikely.
They said they wouldn't call us until today. However, we knew that the best quality would be frozen yesterday and any that they waited to continue to develop would be frozen today. Did I mention the wait has been excruciating?
SIX!! We have 6 perfect frozen blasts! (Quality: 2 - AA, 3 AB, 1 BA)
I am thrilled beyond words. In 2 1/2 years, this is the best news we've gotten since trying to conceive. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, for all of the prayers and words of kindness and good thoughts directed toward my little embies.
I can't quit thinking about Goose. I wish I could hug her. I wish I could tell her how excited I am about all the chances that she's given me. I know that I thanked her in my letter, but even without knowing her, I feel so incredibly close to her. I will never, ever forget what a perfect stranger did for me. Regardless of her motivation, it is still a gift of life and I just hope and pray that my body can take what she started and create a cozy little home for one (or more) of these little ones.
Last bit of good news I have is about me. I finally started my mock cycle on Friday. I did not have a period, but they believe was because my lining was so thin, and they were comfortable starting regardless. So for the next few weeks, I'll be pumped full of hormones to try and figure out the right combination for a perfect FET cycle. I'll also have my Integrin biopsy on November 4th to determined whether or not I'll have to do two months of Depot Lupron before my FET. I hope not...but whatever it takes, I'll do.
All I know is today is a happy day for us. We've had so few, that I'm holding on to this one and I choose to believe that the wind is changing for us.
Much, much love to all of you for continuing to cheer me on. xoxo